I wake up. What time is it? I have to open my eyes to see the clock. If I open my eyes, Renn will know I’m awake. I’ll do it quickly. No, I’m facing the wrong way; I’ll have to turn my head to look. It’s twenty after two. Good. Plenty of time left until I have to get up. Rats. Renn knows I’m awake.
Renn: Purr…purr…purr…
Me: Hello, Renn.
Renn: You’re awake.
Me: Only briefly.
Renn: Purr…purr…purr…
Me: Not so close, Renn. Your whiskers are tickling my nose.
Renn: I like it when you pet me.
Me: I know you do. Move back, Renn. You’re claws are puncturing my skin when you knead.
Renn: I like you.
Me: I like you, too, Renn. I’m going to turn over and face the other way. I’ve been lying on this side for a couple of hours.
Renn: I’ll come over on that side.
Me: No, this is Josie’s spot. She is coming over here even as I speak. Did you notice her silhouette climb down from the cat-tree by the window? She saw I was awake, too.
Renn: This spot is free.
Me: It’s Josie’s spot. She always likes to lie on the bed’s near side.
Renn: I can lie there, too.
Me: No, Renn. You know that Josie doesn’t like other cats being so close. Move back.
Renn: I’ll stay here.
Me: But you’re not staying there, Renn. You are moving closer.
Renn: Purr…purr…purr…
Me: Move…back…Renn… Hello, Josie. It’s all right. Lie down. It’s just Renn. Lie down, Josie. Lie down, Josie. Lie down, Josie. It’s just Renn. Lie down— Just a minute. Move over here, Renn. On this side. Lie down, Renn. Lie down, Josie. Lie down. Lie down.
Renn: I’ll lie here on this side.
Me: That’s a good idea. Josie can then have her favourite side. Move back, Josie. You’re claws are puncturing my skin when you knead.
Josie: I like you.
Me: I like you, too, Josie. Renn, you’re right up against me; you’ve pulled the blanket so tight I can’t move.
Renn: Purr…purr…purr…
Me: Josie, you’re right up against me; you’ve pulled the blanket so tight I can’t move.
Josie: Purr…purr…purr…
Me: What time is it? Fifteen to three. Plenty of time left until I have to get up. Not as much as there was, but still plenty. Good night, everyone.
Renn: Good night.
Josie: Good night.
Me: Who’s that? Oh, hello, Tucker. Give me some room, Tucker. I can’t move.
Tucker: Purr…purr…purr…
Me: Good night, everyone…
This cracked me up; great post! I thought dealing with Derry wanting cuddles in the night was challenging enough. Pet caretakers really do suffer from lack of sleep!
ReplyDeleteIn my case you'd have to add something about middle-aged night sweats being exacerbated by dense fur pressed tightly against my chest and tummy. :-D
always on a work night too. Chanel discovered the bed mouse game about that same time last night
ReplyDeleteOn a work-night, yes. But then, we care less if it happens on a weekend.
DeleteRenn, Josie, Tucker...you don't give your human much sleep time, do you!?!
ReplyDeleteSleep is not what the night-time is for, apparently.
DeleteLOL! I loved your post! As someone once said, "Having a cat is one of the main causes of insomnia!"
ReplyDeleteThank you, and yes, between worry and simple high-jinx, we humans don't sleep much with cats.
DeleteBRILLIANT !!!!!!!!!! ☺☺♥♥
ReplyDeleteThank you!
DeleteIsn't it wonderful that cats are nocturnal?
ReplyDeleteWonderful, yes...
DeleteYour cat is adorable, thanks for the share. Always love checking out your blog.
ReplyDeleteHenry
Thanks, Henry. I'm glad to have you reading.
DeleteLucky you, having those cats love and knead you so much!
ReplyDeleteI could be a little less lucky at that time of night.
DeleteThat was a sweet conversation. I am sure you would have preferred it at 8 am.:)
ReplyDeleteDefinitely.
DeleteOMG! You've just described most nights in my bed, except the names are Saku, Sasha and Sheldon.
ReplyDeleteI try to lie still but it never works...they know when I'm awake. But you know, I wouldn't have it any other way.
Yes, they always know. It's a talent of theirs.
DeleteA perfectly delightful recount of a night spent with cats.
ReplyDeleteThey love you.
And I love them. I also love sleep...
DeleteThank you for the laugh. What a great post - night time with cats. When will cats realize that the poor human needs a good night's sleep in order to get up early and work all day to earn the cats' money?
ReplyDeleteI loved this post. Granted I only have one cat to help me sleep; but she does a most excellent job of helping me just as your beasts do for you. I walk around yawning from mid afternoon onward thanks to the lovingly attended "sleep" I get each night with Katie on my head or plastered to my waist. Thanks for holding a mirror up to what it is like to sleep with the cats! Made my day!
ReplyDeleteSleeping on your head makes up for the lack of numbers. Katie does the work of four or five cats.
DeleteAnd yes, they DO know when you're awake. It's worse than Santa Claus!
ReplyDeleteHa! That made me laugh.
DeleteOh dear, a common theme here, too. I do seem to know when they're awake and when they're not. I can also tell when dad's about to get up at his ridiculous hour so I'm ready to join him.
ReplyDeleteCats have extra-sensory perception in these matters.
DeleteWhat an amusing and clever post, You’ve made me smile on an otherwise tricky day. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteAnd thank you.
DeleteSweet. Mine wakes me up to tell me it is raining outside or its cold, or she's hungry or just to have a chat. Luckily it only takes her a minute to go back to sleep. Me well it takes a lot longer.
ReplyDeleteJulie and poppyq
I love reading about Poppy. She's a busy cat when it comes to what she wants.
DeleteHad to come back again and re-read. I enjoyed this very much. SO accurate and SO likely everywhere there is a loved cat.
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed this! It reminds me so much of Eric and Flynn. The slightest movement and Flynn would be standing on me, nose to nose and purring his loudest purrs. Eric would walk back and forth across my head to make sure I really was awake before flopping down on it.
ReplyDeleteGood Heavens, they sound worse at letting a person sleep than my bunch. What wonderful creatures cats are.
Delete